Through out life, we experience traumatic events. In childhood, we are more vulnerable, have little power, and resign ourselves to not getting our needs met and then try to survive the situation, the best way we can. This can look like watching a family member get beaten up, or directly experiencing the violence. The helplessness and fear experienced in the trauma gets triggered later in life.
Being put into situations that you haven’t been prepared for, or that hurt you, going through severe neglect, or endangerment, can have an effect on your ability to function in future social situations. Without loving support, safety, or personal needs being provided for, a child can feel unloved, unworthy, and fear rejection or more violence when being addressed.
Children can learn to dislike themselves, to put themselves down, to even have contempt for themselves. As the child was treated; the child internalizes the attitudes and values about themselves. This epi-genetic process can become a multi-generational pattern that continues until someone says, “Enough! No more violence!” When one person starts the healing, ripples of compassion, love and forgiveness can begin a new story. Counselling helps you recover from harmful toxic patterns of childhood trauma.
Embracing the inner child is all about making room for safety, dignity, and personal needs to be met, of loving yourself. To love yourself in the past, when you were a child, is to also love yourself in the present. Taking time to listen to your self, self parenting, even a few decades later, is part of healing. Counselling can help you do this, show you how to change your self talk to reflect loving yourself. It is never to late to have a happy childhood, it just looks different.
Play therapy is available for the childhood experiences that were preverbal, is great for children and adults of childhood trauma. No words are needed to start interacting with the figurines, and start the stories. Art work, music, playing the Tibetan singing bowls, the didgeridoo, the keyboard or setting up the montages, all lead to expression of self. It is powerful to have a witness of the story process validate your human experiences. Attunement to the story process, and the storyteller, allows the feelings of compassion and healing.