Rage and Anger management are basic in emotional literacy and self- regulation.
How do you know if you are in your personal power, or in abusive use of power? Learn how to read the signals within your body, the context of the situation and to pay attention to the information in the conflict. Learn how to use your awareness of anger without getting swallowed up in a dangerous emotional tsunami, that is out of control and destroying everything. Underneath blind rage is incredible fear. In order to work with the roots of the anger and rage, you have to look at the woundedness, the trauma, the grief and loss that has not been dealt with. Inner child recovery work can help you reclaim who you are at your best. If you feel that is something you need, then call a professional and set up time to work on your anger issues.
All emotions can be put into the categories of Fear or Love. To break it down further: Fear category includes jealousy, fear of loss, shame, guilt and disconnection. Love category includes gratitude, compassion, empathy, joy, happiness, connection. Of course there are many more descriptive emotional words that can be put into each category. Many time emotions are experienced in overlap, and all at once. In order to identify what emotional experiences are going on, you need to be able to observe behaviors, impacts of behaviors, and to be able to choose to manage your experience.
Be Aware of Your Emotional Responses so You Can Manage Them
Rage and Anger. Anger is a learned response, that probably started when you were still in diapers, couldn’t speak well, got frustrated and needed help, or to call on your personal power.
With parental intervention, the teaching, and correction of behaviour- most people can deal with frustration and irritation before it gets to the rage situation. However we have all experienced loss of control, and had freak outs. Sometimes the frustration builds up over a long time of suppression or disregard of emotional information. In some times the tension, irritation overrides the potential to experience peace and calm.
Anger is a Secondary Emotion
This means that there is an underlying issue that is triggering you. When you can identify what the fear is, you are 1/2 way to managing it. When you can identify the emotions you are experiencing, then you can more easily move into the situations you want to create and choose your responses. You can meet the unmet need yourself, do some self- nurturing to bring what is needed to the situation or shift the entire experience to fit you and others better.
There is Conflict in Every Relationship
The goal is to get to the information about the conflict and find solutions to get your needs and other people’s needed in a win/win situation. To many times people repeat the patterns of dysfunction and get stuck in Fear Traps, getting exhausted, and frustrated and more angry and stuck. This can feel like walking on egg shells, and get increasingly more dangerous. If this is happening to you, I can help you build a safety plan, to shift this experience, show you how to work with it all.